Saying Goodbye

I haven’t written about this yet because it just didn’t feel right, every time I started to write I was drowning in tears. This post is one I’ve never thought I’d write for whatever reason I thought she’d always be here.

Our beloved little Frenchie passed away on January 8th around 8:30pm.
I keep searching for an answer to something that doesn’t have one.
I keep trying to think of a way to fix this grief but the one thing that can is the one thing I can’t have.
I can’t believe she is gone…
The only thing that seems to fix my hurting is looking at photos of her.
I’ve been thinking of every missed opportunity cause now she is gone; a big one was our christmas photos I ran out of time last year and I told Greg in December that in 2016 I wanted a family photo of us including Frenchie… we won’t get that opportunity now.

The week before she passed I still feel as though God was prepping us for it, I took a photo of her in font of the Photo Booth I set up, I got rid of some of her old toys she never played with anymore, I never brought her rugs back in from outside and two days before we dressed her in some of her old clothes and Kayden thought it was so funny that Frenchie had clothes. That weekend was was supposed to be fun, Kayden was set to be at my parents since Greg and I planned to go on a double date with my brother and his GF… which was put on hold cause my brother got sick. I had no idea Frenchie was sick but now when I look back I see all of the signs and I’m even more concerned as to what gave her Cancer.

Through all of this hurting, there are so many things about Frenchie I want to remember. She was unlike any other dog I knew, smart, suspicious, protective and of course loving. When we first got her I instantly fell in love with her she bit me and I knew she would be my dog. She was mine and Greg’s first baby; she taught us how to love and take care of someone other than ourselves. She was with us through so much; our first apartment, my first car {she loved driving around with us}, when I was pregnant with Kayden, and when we got our first home. She was there through some of the rouaghest times and always by my side when I was sad or wasn’t feeling good. She loved Saturday’s cause it was green day and she would dash across the second floor of our home when she got home from being at Nanas cause she wanted her boyfriend. She loved wearing her diamonds and I swear knew exactly what we were saying. Greg and I would talk for her all the time and we’d say she doesn’t say anything but we always felt like she said so much with the way she looked at us.

She was the best dog, our first dog, our fur baby and I miss her terribly!